Imagine if Dorothy stayed in the Emerald City to look for trouble

My Mum always told me Kool-Aid’s bad for you

It’s refreshing to work for a company that doesn’t force me to drink it!

In the presence of intelligence, insight, talent and teamwork, I recovered quickly from the daily drink forced on me by my previous employer. That syrupy sweet, cheap as f@ck beverage that helps makes Ed Hardy attire, gratuitous use of little people and irrefutably awkward public speaking engagements easier to swallow.

My priorities transitioning to this role, 4.5 years ago, were the same as they had always been – work hard for the boss, work harder for your clients and build something to be truly proud of. The difference of course was I no longer had to focus any energy on ridiculous ego-centric enterprises and my hard work, dealing with loyal revenue-generating partners, never again went unnoticed.

Staying classy about my past employer, and remaining grateful for the experience, was easy for me – I was raised right. The managers who mentored me and the exceptional colleagues I left behind as I moved across town are people I still count as friends. This industry is far too small and much too enjoyable to act petty towards your competitors. It amazes me that the company claiming to be the end-all-be-all, the one we all allegedly covet the ‘magic formula’ for behaves so blatantly jealous and infantile.

Recent editorial hooey about my company; so slippery with lube and rife with contradiction, has me wondering how such weak brown-nosing journalists find work. Reading the ‘articles’ through the cracks in my fingers I can’t feel anything but sheer embarrassment for the author. Fontrum actually – that’s more accurate – it’s shame taken to a whole new level. At least 11 days into his employment our friend with the pen clearly has his finger on the pulse and is somehow convinced all past employees were lobotomized upon exit.

The first article references some form of karmic retribution for stolen key staff and strategies nearly five years ago. The follow-up piece insists that only the most ineffective, low-level staff moved over anyway – none of whom were ever within 100 yards of the big man’s office. Make up your narrow mind! Did our departure leave a dent in the organization; and our owners should be feeling a sting for similar (and apparently deserved) circumstances, or are we the useless bottom-feeding crap employees depicted in your sycophantic editorial? Incidentally Mr. Tablog, the over-the-top portrayal of these ‘traitor’ personnel as worthless illustrates precisely why staff left in the first place. It is appreciation and respect that employees value above all not a well-deserved salary – though that didn’t hurt one bit.

It’s a good time to remind you that although grape can be tasty in small doses, drinking the Kool-Aid impairs judgment and can cause embarrassing moments of nob-gobbling.


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